Oh you have belongings? I lost all those 4 years ago.

If you don't have kids and you'd like to know what it's like, carry out the following steps: 

1) Gather every single on of your belongings. 

2) Tip them all on to the floor. 

3) Pick them up. 

4) Repeat to infinity. 

A facebook friend posted that yesterday and I couldn't help but chuckle because it is entirely true. 

Back in my single days, I played computer games, I watched TV, I went out. I could do any of these things whenever I wanted for as long as I wanted. A relationship spells out a transfiguration where this is concerned; you give up some of the things you lived in order to commit yourself to someone and give them your time and energy. Sure, some things remain; as a couple you still have your own interests and still spend some time apart doing the things you love, and that time is equally, if not more, wonderful. 

And then you have kids. 

When you have kids, this transfiguration turns into a death. An all out, complete death of everything you have ever loved doing yourself. Want to go for a wee? Prepare to have two toddlers staring at you. A bath in peace? Forget it. My girls even go so far as to bring their colouring books into the bathroom when they know I am going to the toilet. Yes, your life as you knew it has gone. 

But you know what? As invading and annoying as this can be, I literally could not have it any other way. I adore the matter of fact candor my 4 year old conveys when I'm in the bathroom ("daddy - when you've finished your poo, can we play on the wii?") I adore the sacrifice even, because by giving my girls the time that I would have ordinarily spent pursuing selfish goals, I am hopefully giving them something they will always remember me for - my undivided attention and time. And that's so worth it.